Willingness is the Key

I am deeply tired. We have been having a rough time lately. My autoimmune disease has been flared up causing pain, fatigue and general malaise. Kai just underwent his bi-annual appointment at the eye clinic 4 hours from home. It’s hard to endure those long drives, long waits and painful tests when the outcome is only for school documentation — no treatment. Top that off with my oldest son having to learn some hard self-care lessons while away at college and sprinkle it with my dad’s inability to admit to a severe drug and alcohol addiction and I find myself wondering: Am I willing?  

  1. My own experience with a chronic autoimmune disease has taught me that self-care and self-compassion matters. How I talk to myself and how I treat myself impacts my body’s ability to recover. Being willing to “hear” my body’s signals and respond appropriately makes living with chronic illness more manageable. Willingness is the key.
  2. Kai’s vision loss due to Retinitis Pigmentosa has taught us that willingness to adapt is crucial. Since he could not gain access to information in visual ways it quickly became clear that we must be willing to learn and adapt. Willingness to adapt has provided us with tools, resources, and opportunities for growth. The growth has allowed us to overcome many internal and external barriers to accessibility and inclusion.  Willingness is the key.
  3. We’ve been coaching our eldest son through some tough decisions related to his college education, his part-time management job, and self-care. He must be willing to ask himself questions and listen to his inner wisdom. He must be willing to dig deep and look at his self-expectations, his motivations, and his situation clearly. He must be willing to let go of everyone else’s judgments, all the noise, in order to hear what is in his heart.  Once he has a clear view, he can make appropriate changes. Willingness is the key.
  4. Living with my dad’s active addiction to drugs and alcohol has taught us exactly how important willingness is — and exactly why it’s the key. People must be willing to admit the truth in order to make positive change. If someone is not willing to see clearly, there is nothing anyone can do to help. Willingness is the key.

Willingness is the name of the key to the gate of awakening,
for even to awaken from deep sleep and face the new day,
there must be willingness to do it. — Buddhist wisdom

Today I am willing.

Lotus flower.

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